Cactus

Mwahahahaha!

2007-02-08T09:10:21Z

Norfolk County Council have set up free wireless network spots around the county (you may have heard of the one around the Forum). There's another one centered on County Hall, with a radius of four kilometres. My living room is about 300 metres from County Hall.

Ergo, free internet. Freee!

Expect to see me rambling more frequently, and actually reading what other people write more often than once every six months. :-)

Hello!

2006-08-12T15:46:32Z

My (slow-moving) plans to get online at home have fallen through as my PC has died. Possibly a motherboard fault, but I'm tempted to just replace the whole kit and kaboodle.

I'm currently oop north cat-sitting for my parents and drinking their wine, with a little help from Kt. (Not Ian's Kt, my Kt! Confusing, innit?)

What can I say?

2006-02-27T19:09:29Z

No, seriously, what can I say?. Steph's death has hit me hard, it didn't seem at all real until Saturday and it still shocks me when I remember why I'm feeling so low.

I made it to work on Thursday and Friday, but couldn't concentrate and didn't get a great deal done. Today was worse because I had to oversee some training for four hours. Nothing difficult, 'training' is something of an exaggeration, but it robbed me of the oppotunities I needed to sit and stare into space from time to time.

All things considered I did have a very good weekend. Thank you to (in order of appearance) Lisa, Jo, Becky, Andreas, Chris and Lauren who came over on Friday night. I hope you all got as much support as I did. And in Saturday's Live Mage game we saved the world, which involved me rewiring the interior of a nuclear missile. It's remarkable how something like that will focus your attention.

On Sunday I turned all domestic and changed my bed, did some laundry, vaccumed the floor (Chris' fault, mostly), did some ironing and did two loads of washing up in my unexpectedly sticky kitchen (Lauren's fault, mostly). Thanks again to Jo and Lisa, and to Jess and Mark, for inviting me round for tea, biscuits and Firefly.

I'm so glad to have so many good friends around me, more than I realised. (Many of whom I have Steph to thank for, but I can't.) I'm resolved to spend more time with these people because you never know how long you have together, and it's probably never going to be long enough.

Machismo.

2006-02-08T18:20:57Z

Tom Jones makes it all better. That self-assured, golden-larynxed, icon of manliness has told to stop being so self-indulgent and reminded me that I am great, and that my heart hasn't been broken yet. :-)

Where's my chest wig?

I had an almost fun day at work too, as I succeeded in breaking the quotation system I'm testing. This is good. Testing things that work is getting very tedious and I can do it with less than half my concentration, leaving too much mental capacity for brooding, panicking, humming Frank Sinatra songs, smiling soppily or just staring at a cup of coffee.* When stuff goes wrong I actually have to focus, and explain to people why/how it is wrong. Now I am the Man Who Breaks Things.

*The label on the machine says it's coffee. I suspect that the large white pipe coming out of the wall just pumps it up from the river Wensum.

cactus_ltg @ 2006-02-07T18:58:00

2006-02-07T19:00:18Z

Tip: Save time by hitting the return key instead of clicking on "search"

Another pearl of wisdom from the information hyperstore that is Google. *rolleyes*

Livin' in a box, livin' in a paradox.

2006-02-04T14:17:58Z

It's a wonderful feeling to be in love, and it's agonising to be so uncertain about the future.

cactus_ltg @ 2006-01-23T19:35:00

2006-01-23T19:39:40Z

Why was my previous entry titled "Sindig?" Strangely premonitious of me...

Thank you very very much everybody*, I had a fantastic time and a horrendously long-lasting hangover. I shut the doors to the kitchen yesterday and went out, leaving windows open. Hopefully intelligent life will have evolved by now and mopped the floor for me.

The fabulous library computer has blocked all but the first four entries on my friends page, but I'm sure you're all having a great time doing whateber you're doing.

Best wishes, I'm off home to clean up and have a margarita. Or a bloody mary. Probably both.

*No sarcasm, honestly.

Sindig!

2006-01-17T13:11:43Z

Cactus would like to invite

......readers of his LiveJournal*......

to his housewarming party.

Saturday 21st January, 22 Netherwood Green, from about five-ish.

There'll be floor space for those who wish to stay all night (I know I will be...) and bacon butties in the morning for the survivors. Drinking and games are definitely in the offing, and more than a few people have threatened drinking games too.

See you soon!

*Apart from that little toe-rag at the back. I don't like the way he looks at me.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

2005-12-22T13:31:30Z

I was going to tell you all about how I flooded the flat downstairs, but I swore so often that the @#*"ing library computer wouldn't let me post it. Here's the important bit:

House warming party is now confirmed for 21st and 22nd January. If you can't make it on the Saturday (and by the gods you'd better have a good reason) then drop in on Sunday for the Hangover Recovery Session with games, films and bacon butties.*

I saw The Lion Witch and the Wardrobe earlier this week. I think I remember now why I haven't re-read the books in so long. The plot's wafer thin and really rather dull. I should have spent the money on a copy of The Box of Delights.

Happy Christmas/Hannukah/humbug dear readers, and I'll see you in the New Year.

*A vegetarian option will be available, provided I haven't eaten all the cornflakes.

My last update.

2005-12-03T00:39:03Z

Well, not my last, but I'm moving house tomorrow so I'll only be online sporadically until I can get a new connection established.

Keep on truckin'!

Why not, eh?

2005-11-30T20:47:46Z

A - Age of your first kiss: Sixteen, I think.
B - Band you are listening to right now: I'm not, it's people arguing on Radio 4.
C - Crush: Current or past? Either way, I'm not telling you.
D - Dad's name: Stuart McPhillips
E - Easiest person(s) to talk to: Tricky, I don't open up easily. I can ramble on for hours with Paul and Puppy.
F - Favorite ice cream: I don't know. Probably a mixture with some fruit. Or a 99.
G - Gummy worms or gummy bears: Bears. Odd question.
H - Hometown: Golcar, near Huddersfield. West Yorkshire.
I - Instruments: I'll show you mine if you show me yours. ;-)
J - Junior high: Heaton Manor was my first secondary school.
K - Kids: Hate 'em. I might be sterile anyway. I really should confirm that at some point.
L - Longest car ride: Lancashire to somewhere in the middle of France, I think.
M - Mum's name: Penelope Jane Saville McPhillips
N - Nicknames: Cactus. Weasel.
O - One wish: To be content.
P - Phobia: Embarassment.
Q - Quote: "Don't do in this life what you can put off until your next." "Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely."
R - Reasons to smile: Moving house.
S - Song you danced to last: I think it was whatever they played at the end of eighties night a month ago.
T - Time you woke up today: 9:22. Too late.
U - Unknown fact about me: I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.
V - Vegetable(s) you hate: Cauliflower and brocolli.
W - Worst habit: Putting things off.
X - X-rays you've had: Teeth, head and chest.
Y - Years since you've been to church: For a ceremony? About fifteen, my Gran's funeral.
Z - Zodiac sign: Virgo/Libra.

There now. Don't you feel enlightened?

Slut meme.

2005-11-29T21:00:03Z

cactus_ltg's LiveJournal Slut Stats
The below percentages indicate what cactus_ltg has done with the 32 people on his friends list!

met

93.8%

hugged

46.9%

dated

0.0%

kissed

3.1%

seen topless

0.0%

seen naked

3.1%

phone sexed

0.0%

made out

0.0%

oral sex

0.0%

fucked

0.0%

What are your LiveJournal Slut Stats?
Sponsored via Adult Friend Finder. Keep this meme and others like it checking it out or getting free account! You may meet the match of your dreams!

Anybody else want a hug?

Quarantine

2005-11-22T03:11:13Z

Just a quick update - I'm still alive; my rash has progressed through the stage of spots and is now a series of large scabs. I wouldn't wish shingles on anybody.* I'm due back at work on Wednesday, but I intend to blag at least half the day off. My sleeping is so irregular now that I won't be able to get through a whole day of real work.

Contracts have been exchanged on the flat and completion will (touch wood) be on Friday. So I'll be moving in in about a fortnight, but I'm deferring the house-warming party until January 'cos mid-December's a stupid time to try and get people together.

I'm gutted that I had to miss the Live Mage game on Saturday. I was really looking forward to it now that I have a handle on how the system worked and I've started forcing myself into the plot. And it sounds like it was a lot of fun.

*Note, the definition of 'anybody' may not include everybody.

Killing time.

2005-11-15T23:46:28Z

Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that Artist: Monty Python's Flying Circus

Are you male or female:: I've Got Two Legs
Describe yourself:: I'm So Worried
How do some people feel about you:: Oh Lord Please Don't Burn Us
How do you feel about yourself:: The Meaning of Life
Describe your ex girlfriend:: All Things Dull and Ugly
Describe your current girlfriend:: Ho Ho Fucking Ho
Describe where you want to be:: Christmas in Heaven
Describe what you want to be:: Oliver Cromwell
Describe how you live:: Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
Describe how you love:: Every Sperm is Sacred
Share a few words of wisdom:: Never Be Rude to an Arab

Needless to say, I had to twist some of the answers to fit the available song titles.

Shingles

2005-11-15T19:36:37Z

Ow.

So, I finally got to the doctor's today. I was in so much pain this morning that I rang them and asked if they had anything earlier than tomorrow morning and they squeezed me in at quarter to six. The very nice locum took one look at my rash and said "That looks like a classic case of shingles to me." He prescribed me some anti-vrial drugs and some painkillers to take on top of the Nurofen and told me to take it easy.

Apparently shingles is a re-emergence of the chickenpox virus (which lies dormant in your spine) and is brought on by stress or over-exertion. Too much partying. :-( Nothing at all to do with the flu jab.

So I now have a sick note for a week off work, I've pulled out of all of this week's games and won't be going to Noam's birthday party. I may make it to the Harry Potter film on Friday, simply 'cos I've pre-booked my ticket. Unfortunately the pharmacy in Sainsbury's didn't have the drugs in stock, so I've got one more Nurofen tablet to last me until the morning. Either that or I overdose. What they did have was the Band of Brothers boxed set, golden syrup cake, coke, clementines, bananas, a chicken madras ready-meal and spare rib flavour oriental crackers. So it's not all bad. :-)

My mum asked me if I wanted to go and stay with them. I briefly contemplated travelling 250 miles with a sore back to stay in a house with my parents, my grandma, my sister, her husband and three cats and decided that the sofa in my damp bedsit would be a lot more restful.

cactus_ltg @ 2005-11-15T00:46:00

2005-11-15T00:51:56Z

I'm updating this now as I don't know when I'll next have the opportunity to give 'The Shipping Forecast' as my current music. :-D

Damn rash has spread a bit. My doctor's been taken ill so the appointment I had for Tuesday morning has been pushed back to Wednesday. But I have twelve hours of The Lord of Rings to entertain me. And a bag of Haribo.

I need to go to the solicitors but I don't want to get dressed any more often than I have to, so I may put that off until Wednesday.

I can't sleep because I had a nap this afternoon. I'd like a hug but my back's so sore that I'd probably lamp you. :-(

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. - George Bernard Shaw

F.A.B. Thunderbirds are go!

2005-11-13T21:22:04Z

I've got the mortgage acceptance now, and the owner of the flat wants to sign contracts by 24th November. This is looking good.

Less good is the rash on my chest/back/left armpit. It appeared overnight but doesn't seem to have spread much since. I'm guessing that this is linked to the pain in my arms and back over the last week, and it may not be coincidental that said pain came on the day after my flu jab (in my left arm). I'll call the doctor tomorrow and make an appointment...

Yesterday I played a very good game of Warhammer against Jarval. After committing five units and two characters between us (2,176 points!) to a huge mosh in the centre of the battlefield I came out on top and held the Shrubbery of Chaos.* I learned a little more about how to use my disposable units, and what to watch out for with frenzied troops.

I followed this with a game of Arkham Horror with Ian, which I thoroughly recommend. We need to play this again with five or six players. Possibly in the 'dead week' in the live games schedule? And yes, as the name suggests, this is loosely based on the work of the infamous Howard Philip Lovecraft and friends.

*This needs to be read in a deep, booming voice to truly impart the aura of doom that surrounded some polystyrene topped with plastic trees.

Still at home....

2005-11-10T13:54:54Z

...so here's another meme!

You scored as Batman, the Dark Knight. As the Dark Knight of Gotham, Batman is a vigilante who deals out his own brand of justice to the criminals and corrupt of the city. He follows his own code and is often misunderstood. He has few friends or allies, but finds comfort in his cause.

</td>

Batman, the Dark Knight

92%

James Bond, Agent 007

71%

Captain Jack Sparrow

63%

William Wallace

58%

Maximus

58%

Indiana Jones

54%

Lara Croft

54%

El Zorro

54%

The Amazing Spider-Man

46%

Neo, the "One"

46%

The Terminator

29%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

Result! :-D

In other news, I've now finished the single player campaign from Dawn of War, and one of the two shorter campaigns from Winter Assault. It may be time to venture online... Look out world, there's a n00b tank commander coming your way!

Oh, and I was right yesterday. Charles Bronson (and friends) did indeed foil the terrorists.

Who put that goat there?

2005-11-09T14:26:07Z

I clicked on a button at the top of page labelled 'My LJ'. At the bottom of that page was a picture of a goat in a santa hat. He appears to be called Frank.

Am I hallucinating again?

And now he's pissing everywhere!

cactus_ltg @ 2005-11-09T14:05:00

2005-11-09T14:11:11Z

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't search around and look for the 'coolest' book you can find. Do what's actually next to you.

"Years after the mysterious disappearance of her father, plucky runaway Caroline Boyle (O'Grady) receives a letter from him requesting that she return for a family reunion." - The Time Out Film Guide 2003

So, I'm at home today because my back, shoulders and upper arms are aching and tender. I don't know why, I can't find any swelling or bruising, they just hurt. As a result I'm subjected to day-time television and Channel Four's afternoon adventure film: Raid on Entebbe. A rather good film from Irwin Kershner which can be summed up as 'Charles Bronson foils* Palestinian hostage-taking. Also featuring Idi Amin.'

*At least, I assume he will. We're only half-way through at the time of writing.

Yay for dancing in circles!

2005-11-05T12:03:18Z

Work yesterday was cruddy, but not taxing so I came home early and played Dawn of War (a present to myself for having suffered £35.00 of treatment at the hands and drill of my dentist). It really is a lot of fun blowing stuff up. :-D

Eighties night was very good, with mucho dancing. Bizarrely, the DJ seemed to have bought some new CDs as his playlist was noticeably different from the ususal one. Afterwards I spent an hour standing outside chatting to Jon, Puppy, Paul, Bea and Eleanor (Andreas left a little earlier, elderly light-weight that he is ;-) ) before Puppy had the idea of retiring to my flat for after-party drinks. Bondage sketches, speculation of anal-raping Jar-Jar Binks with C-3P0, and comparisons of relative shoe size and innocence were among the topics of our wholesome conversation. So I haven't slept yet.

I've just come back from the doctor's, and am now vaccinated against 'flu for a year, and against pneumonia for life. N33dl3s am t3h w1n!!!!111!!1 I'm tired, but not sleepy, and am damn tempted to play Dawn of War until I drop...

And unlike the rest of you miserable buggers, I'm not unhappy in the slightest.

Just a quickie...

2005-11-03T04:16:30Z

Nicked from Jarval's LJ:

My life has been rated:

See what your rating is!
Created by bart666

What does this mean?

To quote the BBFC: The R18 category is a special and legally restricted classification primarily for explicit videos of consenting sex between adults. Such videos may be supplied to adults only in licensed sex shops, of which there are currently about 90 in the UK.

You are filthy. Congratulations!

You fit in with:
Atheism

Your ideals mostly resemble those of an Atheist. You have very little faith and you are very focused on intellectual endeavors. You value objective proof over intuition or subjective thoughts. You enjoy talking about ideas and tend to have a lot of in depth conversations with people.

60% scientific.
80% reason-oriented.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Friday - I'm planning on having a drink or three in the Coach and Horses followed by the Ferryboat before 80's Night. If you're reading this you're probably welcome to come along. And in the unlikely event that you're stalking me and you aren't welcome, you can just tell me it was a coincidence. I won't know you're lying.

The Cactus Horror Picture Show

2005-10-30T20:11:30Z

Photo of my costume from last night:

http://img427.imageshack.us/img427/4230/cactushorror15cl.jpg

I've adjusted the brightness to better show off my legs. ;-) And, as I seem to remember that Hazel wanted to see my sister's wedding dress, here it is:

http://img445.imageshack.us/img445/7154/dscf00017kj.jpg

(I hope I got those links the right way round...)

Girls, eat more pies!

2005-10-25T07:46:04Z

Curvy and Cute

Raw score: 55% Big Breasts, 59% Big Ass, and 68% Cute!

Thanks for taking the T and A and C test! Based on your selections, the results are clear: you show an attraction to larger breasts, larger asses, and cuter composures than others who've taken the test.

Note that you like women overall curvier than average.

My third variable, "cuteness" is a mostly objective
measure of how innocent a given model looked. It's determined by a
combination of a lot of factors: lack of dark eye makeup, facial
expression, posture, etc. If you scored high on that variable, you are
either really nice OR you're into deflowering teens. If you scored low,
you are attracted to raunchier, sexier, women. In your case, your higher than average score suggests you appreciate a cuter, nicer look. Kudos!

Recommended Celebrities: Beyonc� and Actress Elisha Cuthbert.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 66% on tit-size
You scored higher than 74% on ass-size
You scored higher than 68% on cuteness

Link: The Tits, Ass, and Cuteness Test written by chicken_pot_pie on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Those girls were all too skinny.

Keyboard test

2005-10-23T13:33:38Z

Sator
Arepo
Tenet
Opera
Rotas

I'm not a pheasant plucker I'm the pheasant plucker's son,
I'm only phucking pleasants till the pleasant phucker comes.

Looks like the backup keyboard works, although the space bar is a little more sensitive than I'm used to. I'll be careful not to spill water in this one.

[ Late night update ] I've had to remove four pointless keys from this thing to prevent me accidentally hitting them. The upshot of which is that I now have four buttons marked 'sleep', 'wake up', 'power' and 'turbo'. Who needs a turbo function on their keyboard? Not me, I'm a two-fingered typist. The space bar is bollocksed though, even after I levered it off and blew the dust out. Also, the backspace key is half the size of one on any other keyboard I've ever used (because for some reason the hash and tilde key is in the wrong place, and 'return' appears to be on sideways) so I keep missing it. I may celebrate Pay Day with a trip to Maplins for a new keyboard. Mmmm, wireless. *goes to look in his Maplins catalogue*